Road to Love

I was writing a lot more when I was still new to New York, because everything was a new experience and adventure.  Through lots of trial and tribulation, I finally found some stability and grounding here, so I'm now able to work on myself and goals from a more focused, anchored place.  While I'm not one to write confessionals on the subject of sex/dating/love, it has been (and continues to be) one of biggest challenges I've faced.  Ever the optimistic student of life, I've tried to take the lesson from each positive and seemingly negative encounter, but I will tell you this.   I'm tired.  I think a lot of people are.


This city seems to breed a lot of protection walls, and a good shield is an essential tool, but I'm noticing that, when neither person lets his guard down, nothing gets accomplished and things remain on that level.  It's a self-feeding loop of getting hurt, putting up the defenses, releasing expectations, giving someone else a shot, wasting time and money on yet another asshole, getting hurt again but becoming more hardened and less affected by it, until everyone is just running around out there not affected by anyone else.  Not needing any kind of human intimacy because you can order up a different flavor every night of the week if you want.  And with websites and apps, you don't even have to leave your house!  Free delivery!


I've been in a giant lab experiment for the past year and a half, and although I've started to feel like a lab rat, I've learned volumes from my research.  I have no regrets, and I've explored aspects of myself that I needed to in order to grow in confidence.  I'm not a saint, but I also no longer consider myself a "hopeless" romantic.  More of a romantic realist at this point.  I'm very aware of how to have no expectations and just have fun, but for someone like me who really does love love, there always is that little spark of hope in the background, that maybe this guy could be someone I could connect with, and get off the hamster wheel and out of the cage.  And I think there are others out there who feel the same way, but they too are caught up on the wheel and don't know how to stop it.

I've invited a lot of active, constructive fire energy into my life recently, and I'm noticing a huge difference already.  I've been aligning my mind, body and spirit through yoga, exercise and spiritual studies.  There's also a big dose of adventure in store for this year.  As frustrated as I may get about this whole dating debacle, it pales in comparison to the self-love I've been experiencing.  Like Bjork said, all is full of love.  Family, friends, myself...my heart is full and I am grateful for my blessings.  The longing and loneliness comes and goes, and I know I'm a better man for staying true to myself.  I've learned to truly enjoy my own company, and I'm actually making a solo pilgrimage in September to hike the Inca Trail to Macchu Picchu.  I honestly believe the idea of people coming into your life for a reason, and I know when the time is right, someone will appear to climb mountains and discover new shores with me.  Until then, chin up babe.  There's work to be done.

From Winter Abbey

Legend has it, in a far off mountain range lies a snow covered keep called Winter Abbey.  Through centuries of war, murder, births and loves come and gone, the ghosts of memories past still haunt the walls.  Some are lost souls, wandering the halls in search of peace they will never find.  Some are forever bound in love, and death.  And yet others are vengeful and angry, twisted into monsters as they drive themselves, and guests, insane.  Many a traveler have braved a cold winter's night here, but precious few have come back, raving mad and trapped in a neverending fugue state.  Challenge the darkness if you dare, but be warned. Nary a soul has appeared with his wits about him that returns From Winter Abbey.

*iPod/iPhone users: place tracks in a PLAYLIST

before syncing to ensure correct song order!

 

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Gold Dust

Hello there,


By now your Halloween costume is probably tossed in the garbage, at the bottom of the hamper or lost to the ether somewhere.  You're left with this waiting period until Thanksgiving and the holiday whirlwind.  Never fear, my friends, I have a special surprise for you.  This is Gold Dust, my 2009 fall mix, and also my favorite.  This mix really captures that mysterious, electric, primal feeling that only autumn can bring.  If you've ever seen the golden light of a sunset through the forest trees, the smell of chimney smoke somewhere in the distance, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.  Happy hunting!


petropolis

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From the Grave!

Hello kiddies,


My name is Sir Cosmo von Bathory.  Petropolis is out scampering about town in this despicable weather doing god knows what in preparation for this quaint little holiday you all celebrate.  All fun and games to you, but this is the day I was murdered, and it was not a pretty sight. But that is neither here nor there.  Today I am bringing you a little treat, as I am in hiding and not making any appearances this year.  I give you From the Grave: Halloween Revisited. It's a "best of," if you will, culled from several past years of Halloween mixes by Petropolis himself. I do hope you enjoy this and play it at all your silly little parties.  I, however, will be reliving my own death, as I do year after year.  But I shall bore you no more.  Enjoy your holiday.


Sir Cosmo von Bathory

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Electric Chapel

Well kids, the change is finally upon us.  Summer is gone, the light is waning and the air has that crackle of excitement as fall begins.  I'll be going upstate this weekend to start it off right with some hiking, apple picking and pumpkin pie eating.  I'm kinda in love with this mix right now.  A little darkness and rock n' roll never hurt nobody.  So grab your Jameson or Jack and burn a hole in the road.


petropolis

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Reborn This Way

This is at once a mix posting and a confessional, so bear with me.  I've been kinda quiet on the blog the past couple of months, but inside my head has been a cacophony of thoughts, ideas and emotions.  After a sense of accomplisment from reaching the year mark in NYC, a silent question hung over me.  Now what?  I thought I knew the direction I was headed, but then the bottom dropped out of some big plans, and I found myself back at square one, feeling more lost than ever.  Now I see several forks in the road, several possible paths, several decisions to make.  It took a minute, but I've now embraced the change, calling on my learned skills of adaptability and seeing where certain paths lead.  Traveling down my own road, watching the signs as I go.

While my mixes are really fun to make, they're also time capsules of where I'm at, mentally and emotionally, at this point in my life.  I think that's why it took so long to get this mix out this summer, because I didn't know what I was feeling.  Everything I tried to put together felt forced, until I retreated to Pennsylvania and had an amazing weekend with an old friend.  Good advice, strange dreams, and the untimely death of an amazing talent oddly came together to crystallize everything for me, to let me know that...it's ok.

So take a swim in the cool waters and brilliant sunshine of Reborn This Way.  It's my own version of a soul-cleansing spiritual baptism.  Even if it only makes sense to me, it'll still make you smile and maybe move your feet.  Enjoy!

This mix is dedicated to Kendall, a true soul mate.  And to Amy, who will be dearly missed.


Petropolis

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Sunshine & Popsicles

Well, it hasn't exactly been all sunshine and popsicles this past year, but I've definitely grown emotionally attached to this city.  Here's a glimpse at some of the amazing people and small wonders I continue to find...

The Year of Ganesha

Thursday, June 2, 2011
12:48pm, Madison Square Park

One year ago today I arrived in New York City, all bright-eyed and ready for my month and a half vacation/adventure.  I had no way of knowing just how much of an adventure it would turn out to be, one that has changed my life in every way.  I can't believe it's been a year.  Not that it's gone by quickly, but that it's been a year and I'm still here.  I did it.  I've been told that year one is the toughest in NYC, almost as if the city is testing you.  I went through six residences, three jobs, losing my wallet, phone, job, a friend...and yet what I've gained is worth more than anything.  Much like a romantic relationship, I sometimes wish I could go back to that dizzying wonder I felt when I first arrived, because so many things are familiar to me already.  But now, instead of looking up at everything in awe, I am a part of it all.  A friend recently told me that this city holds a mirror up to you and shows you who you really are.  Being so far away from what I had always called home and overcoming so many obstacles, I really did come face to face with myself.  And a year later, I have to say I really like the person that's grown before me in the mirror.

The single biggest lesson I've learned is gratitude.  While I am proud of myself for sticking it out and making the choices I did, I never would've gotten to where I am without the help and support of amazing friends and family, and without accepting help from the universe even when it was offered in unexpected ways.  I am grateful to be alive and blessed with so much love in my life.  Ganesha continues to place (and remove) obstacles before me, and I am thankful for these opportunities for learning and growth.

The question I get most often is, "are you just loving it up there?"  The answer is yes, and no.  It's hard to be away from my family and friends back home.  But I've also gained a family of friends here, something I never expected.  I don't wake up in the morning thinking, "I fucking love this city!"  But there are days, like today, when I'm head over heels in love with it.  This is where I'm supposed to be right now.  It's a holding place for me to expand and grow until it's time to move on to the next thing.  Outdoor work and New Zealand are on the horizon, but we'll get to that later.  For now, I just want to bask in the glory of this amazing city with a heartbeat like no other, and look up at it in wonder.

Paul

Let's Play a LoveGAME

Hello, lovers.  By now spring has finally arrived in the Big Apple, and everyone's got the fever.  Whether you're sweating in the gym, bedroom or dancefloor, LoveGAME is here to cool you off.  I didn't get to make a Valentine's Day mix this year, but this somehow feels more appropriate.  Its dance pop sensibility isn't for everyone, so just take this heart-shaped lollipop...and suck it. <3

xxxo petropolis

LET'S PLAY A LOVEGAME

SprinquiNEXT: The Return to Life

First, there was Enter the Sprinquinox.  No one can be told what the Sprinquinox is...

Then came Bubble Pop Electric Youth, a pink and poppin' blowout from Uptown Doodie Brown.

Last year was Spectacular Springtacular (in the words of the vernacular), presented online in all its glory.

NOW, prepare yourself to get seriously happy. This is SprinquiNEXT...The Return to Life!

DOWNLOAD SPRINQUINEXT SIDE A

DOWNLOAD SPRINQUINEXT SIDE B

Special thanks for the dazzling vocal stylings of Miss Whitney Campbell

and to the City of New York for being ambient gold.

*Note for iPod/iPhone users: be sure to put the download into a playlist,

otherwise iTunes likes to do it's own thang :)